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Before You Find the "Love of Your Life"

I agree that we are a little broken at some point in time. There is not a human on this earth who has not faced some kind of heart-wrenching situation. But, how do we handle this? How do we restore true joy, happiness, and hope? Some people search for it in friends; Others may try to stay busy to keep their mind off of reality; Or, if you are like me, you continue to search for all of these things in a "significant other". Countless relationships end in disaster because we try to fill the void in our life with human help, instead of godly help. Let's not get ahead of ourselves though! I am still learning, I know, but I have dealt with toxic relationships. I have dealt with trying to find safety in someone other than God. It is so unhealthy! So, let's talk about it...

     This is gonna be a hard pill to swallow, but just hear me out. The first thing you need to do before you think about pursuing any relationship is to BE SATISFIED WITH YOUR STATE OF SINGLENESS! We get so unsatisfied with where God has put us that is upsets us. We want to rush into the first thing that comes our way. Just be honest, that's how it is. I have personally been heartbroken countless times because I am so quick to fall for the first guy to show me attention. But, what happens when the guy does not want to do things the way you do, and you have already grown attached to him? It leaves you BROKEN! Then the cycle starts all over again. Find a guy. Grow attached. Get heartbroken. Guys this is for you too. I continue to use girls as an example because I am a girl, but girls break boys hearts too! You need to come to a point in this cycle that you get tired of it and call out to God for help. I don't care if it has been a year since you have talked to him, he has been waiting for you with open arms. Once again, I am getting ahead of myself! Haha! I will say one more thing and move on to the next point. We should be so focused on serving God, that we can not even focus on finding a significant other. If you are single, don't think you will be alone forever! God just needs you to focus on loving HIM and loving yourself, before he sends you someone to love! In Mark 12:30-31 God commands us to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Then in verse 31, it says to love your neighbour as YOURSELF! Therefore the order is to 1. Love God 2. Love yourself THEN 3. Love your neighbour! 

     Okay, so we discussed being satisfied with singleness. Now you need to FOCUS ON YOUR PURPOSE AND WORTH. Do not ever think you are worthless. GOD LOVES YOU AND HE MADE YOU IN HIS IMAGE! But, when you do not even "like yourself", so to speak, how can you LOVE someone else? Think about it for a second. Why every time you get into a relationship do you both seem so sorrowful? It's like the two of you can't ever stop fussing, and you continually talk about your problems! First of all, BREAK IT OFF. My pastor told his daughter if you fight when you are courting, marriage will be even worse. Keep that in mind. Second of all, girl stop venting to someone who can not help you! Vent to God. If you ever feel like you need to know how much you are worth, go and read Gods word: 1 Corinthians 25:10; 1 Peter 2:9; Psalm 139:14; Song of Solomon 4:7; Isaiah 43:1 You do not need anyone to tell you what you are worth. Do not let the world define who you are. If you are not satisfied with YOUR identity, you will be so uncomfortable. Stop looking at "her" Instagram wishing you were her. There is only one YOU, and God needs you to understand that so he can use you for the ministry! If you can not identify yourself, you will not be able to show another person who you truly are.  

    The last and most important thing us singles need to keep our focus on is SERVING JESUS! Through your season of singleness, you have to learn that you really are not alone. It may feel like it some days, but that is when God steps in and says "I will never leave you or forsake you!" We have to come to understand that if we are not content with God and the season he has us in, how will someone else give us contentment? I was reading the other day in 1 Timothy chapter 6 and stumbled over the verse "but godliness with contentment is great gain". Wow! What great timing God. I personally have not been satisfied with the season of life that I am right now and this verse SAID IT ALL!!  He says godliness WITH contentment. What is contentment? It is a state of happiness and satisfaction; having accepted one's situation. I may be taking it out of context, but I believe God is trying to tell us that if we live a life that is pleasing to him, then we will be content in each season! Fill yourself with HIM! Read what he has to say in His word.  Talk to him and tell him your problems. Listen when you talk to him! 

     Remember that in order to be satisfied with your singleness and know your worth, you have to communicate with the Father. Work on strengthening your relationship with Christ, so you can eventually have a strong relationship with the person God sends your way. Psalm 37:4 says "Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart." He is faithful to give us what we desire! I really hope this reached out to someone. This has been on my heart for a few days because it is what I personally struggle with, but I am choosing to MAKE A CHANGE! Keep serving Jesus, it is THE BEST LIFE!!! 










                                      









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